The Mustard Seed episode 2

The Mustard Seed Faith (episode 2)

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You haven't experienced 'hopelessness' until you find yourself in a terrible situation that has not way-out or solution. That sad moment when you realize that not even the doctors, your family, money, fame or material things can save you from your hopeless situation. When the reality of that revelation dawned on Faith, it suddenly felt as though the whole world was against her; even God. Not in a thousand years did she even imagine contacting the deadly virus HIV. Too sad!

Immediately the doctor confirmed that Faith had HIV, the room was silent. At that moment, Faith was numb and couldn't move an inche of her body. It felt as though the world word stopped and just froze. What a terrible day to be alive for the unfortunate lady.

"You must be joking doctor. How can you say a thing like this to me? I don't have HIV and can never have it. I suggest you run these tests again because I can't accept this report of yours" Faith sadly said. There and then, the doctor took a deep breath and held Faith's hands. "I know how you feel right now because I would do same if I were in your shoes. This test was conducted twice to confirm its authenticity but I don't mind doing it again if that would make you convinced. Regardless, I want to assure you that this isn't the end of the world because you are not alone in this. There are so many people living healthy with HIV and you can do same too. I know this is a lot for you to take in but I promise you won't be alone in this new journey. Kindly accept my sympathy" the doctor calmly said and before she knew it, Faith broke down in tears.

For over 20 minutes, Faith cried bitterly without saying a word to the doctor that kept consoling her. Everything still felt unreal to the devastated lady because it was a hard pill to swallow. Before coming to the hospital, the worst she imagined that could happen to her was having a curable infection or being pregnant. Never for once did it ever cross her mind that her rapist could have given her the dreaded HIV.

At that moment, Faith felt betrayed and abandoned by God. She felt God was cruel to have allowed something of such magnitude to happen to her after all the sacrifice, love and service she had given to him. She was furious and angry at God for repaying her that way and it would take a miracle for things to go back to the way it used to be.

All through the period Faith was crying, the doctor was patient with her and waited till she had emptied her heart of every grief. It wasn't over yet but at-least the reality of her new life had sunk in. "I advice you go home, take a shower and rest. You can visit a new clinic tomorrow to run the test again just to be very sure. Like I said before, you are not alone because there are so many people in your shoes. Also, HIV isn't the end of the world; medications are available to keep you healthy and alive to live a normal life. Don't worry dear, everything will be alright because we are here for you" the doctor said.

On seeing that the doctor had other patients to tend to, Faith felt it was best to take her leave so as not to discomfort or hinder the doctor from doing other activities. She took her test results, thanked the doctor and headed home. As she drove home that evening, the only thought on her mind was 'Suicide'. Who could blame the devastated lady for wanting to take her own life after such fate had befallen her.

Just pause for a moment and imagine what Faith was going through at the moment. How would you feel if you were in her shoes? How would you feel if you kept your body all those years for the right person, only to be raped, deflowered and given a deadly virus all at the same time. There were so many questions in her mind to ask God but she cried at every attempt to voice them out. To be honest, she didn't deserve such fate but who can question God?.

When Faith arrived home, she stayed back inside her car for another 30 minutes crying out loud. Her heart was broken beyond repair and with a heavy heart, she sobbed bitterly till there wasn't any strength again in her. Shortly after, she alight from her car and walked into her apartment.

Immediately Faith entered inside, she fell on the floor and began to sob all over again. "God why me? What did I do to deserve this? Are you truly in heaven seeing all that is happening to me? If Yes, why allow such fate befall me? After all my services and the love I showed towards you, this is what I get in return? I only went to the village to clear my mum's debt and this is the 'Thank You' I get? What is even going on? How can my life change in just a twinkle of an eye. Where did I go wrong and what is the essence of allowing this happen to me? Just take my life because if you don't, I will" she soberly said.

That night felt endless for the devastated lady. She cried and cried and cried, yet it didn't seem like she had even began. The next day was a work day but it didn't seem as though she would show up because their was no will-power to engage in any life activities anymore. She stayed back in bed all morning and cried till her eyes were swollen. While sobbing, her phone rang and it was her mum calling. At first, she didn't want to pick up but later did when she realized that her mom was the only person she could confide in about the sad fate that had befallen her.

"Hello mummy, how are you doing? Faith said when she picked the call. Immediately her mum heard her voice, she knew instantly that something was wrong. "My daughter, have you been crying again? I told you to stop crying; you can't continue to torture yourself like this" her mum said, thinking that the rape incident was still the centre of attention, without knowing that there was more.
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Immediately the concerned woman was done talking, Faith burst into tears. She cried uncontrollably till her mum ran out of words to console her. "Why are you doing this to yourself again? Please my daughter, it is alright. Rape isn't the end of your life, we will overcome this" her mum said and without wasting any more time, Faith revealed the shocking revelation. "Mummy, I have HIV" she soberly said. "What!! What do you mean by HIV" her mum shockingly inquired and Faith started crying all over again. "I have HIV mum, my test results confirmed it yesterday and I don't know what to do right now. How could this happen to me? How can God repay me this way for all I have done for him throughout my lifetime. What exactly did I do wrong to deserve such fate? Why me mum?" She soberly asked.

When Faith was done talking, it dawned on her mum that the answer her daughter sought was no where to be found. The old woman wanted to hug and comfort her daughter so bad but distance was a barrier. However, she tried her very best to comfort Faith through the phone and assured her that everything was going to be alright. Despite all was said to make Faith have hope and trust God's will for her life, it all fell on deaf eyes because Faith saw no hope for her situation.

After about an hour of talking on phone, the call ended and both parties burst into tears. Faith's mum cried bitterly and began to question God too. It suddenly felt as though the whole world was against her and her daughter. It was quite sad that such fate had befallen them. However, God is not dead, he sees and knows everything that happens beneath the sky and above it. Everything might not make sense right now but it will eventually make sense someday. After a sad day, life had to go on regardless.

As the days went by, Faith slowly redrew from God and her service in the house of God. Her phone rang nonstop on Sundys whenever she was absent, but she never picked up. Due to her commitments in the house of God, the minister also knew her well and sent delegates to check up on her but they returned with the same news everytime. "Faith isn't at home, we knocked severally but no one opened the door" this was their usual report whenever they returned from her house.

On the other hand, Faith also slacked in work activities. She was always absent minded and never focused in her job. This drew the attention of her colleagues and manager as time went on. They tried to find out the reason for her sudden absent mindedness and sad countenance but she always told them "It is nothing, I'm fine".

At that time, Faith had conducted two extra tests to confirm her health status but they still came back 'Positive'. It finally dawned on her that she trully had HIV and with immediate effect, she was put on medication to assure a healthy life.

Everytime Faith took those 'Anti Viral' pills, the reality of her condition further dawned on her. Tears became the norm in her life and this left her eyes red and swollen everytime. Love was far fetched in Faith's life because she believed that no man would love her unconditionally. She cut off ties with all the men that were initially asking for her hand in marriage because she knew they would flee if they ever found out her health status. It was quite unfortunate but she had no other option.

It's been a year since Faith was diagnosed with HIV. At this time, she was almost a pagan because she hadn't attended church service since she contacted the virus. For some reasons, she was angry at God and felt it was no use serving a God that had no good intentions for his children. It wasn't the right decision to make but who could blame her for doing such. Faith lived in total sadness and darkness with no hope of a happy life till something beautiful happened one fateful day.

It happened that Faith visited the beach one cool evening to cry and embrace the cool breeze of nature. She sat in a lonely corner of the beach and looked at the water waves beat each other. While staring at the waves, tears fell from her eyes and suddenly, someone gently touched her shoulder from behind. Immediately she felt the touch, she turned to see who had touched her and it was a good looking gentleman dressed causally with a nice smell. Her heart dropped instantly and she quickly cleaned her eyes so he doesn't know she was crying but it was too late because he already knew.

"Are you alright? I saw you crying from a distance" the gentleman calmly said. "I'm fine, thanks for being kind" Faith replied. One look at her and he knew that she was far from being ok. Without hesitating, he sat close to her and smiled faintly. "I won't go anywhere until I know why a beautiful lady like you is crying. By the way, my name is David".

Faith looked into David's eyes, smiled faintly and said. "Nice meeting you David"
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End of episode 2 ?


✍? Written by Sonia Okehie