Dear Readers,
l want to be open to you here, maybe my help can come from
here. My marriage is 18years
now and I have been pretending
to be happy. I love my wife a lot
and I will do anything for her. I
do more favour to my wive’s people more than myself. My
brothers are well to do, so
sometimes they fill in the gap,
making my parents to over look
my absence in terms of money.
I am a very quiet person and I don’t want problems in my life, I
built my house while I was
working in a bank and I
resigned and got my own
company, which I’m managing
now. My wife was my university friend and we never courted
much and got married. I married
her a virgin too.
One of her problem that I find
too hard to deal with is temper.
She has a high temper. And when I try to ask her some
things she flares up. I
sometimes don’t ask anymore
because she can’t have a low
tone conversation. I live in fear
because sometimes in the middle of a conversation, once
she flares up and approaches
me, Cynthia , she will drag me
to the ground and beat the hell
out of me.
It’s a shameful thing to say but I must say it. After chatting with
you yesterday evening, I
decided to open up. My wife
beats me and it has occurred
countlessly. My children have
witnessed it countlessly and it has reduced now that the
children are grown . I have 4
boys. The last time she did it,
my son intervened and gave
her a blow on the nose and she
backed off. Instead of discussing things with my wife,
I rather send her a text
message or call her on the
phone while at work.
She has her good part, which is
she cooks and keeps the house neat, but for sex, it is when she
wants , and in the middle of the
sex, once she gets angry, she
gets up and goes away. I don’t
know if any other man is
experiencing what am seeing in my marriage.
Last 2 months, we buried my
father, so after the burial, we
seated for a family meeting, all
my brothers were around and
their wives, before this meeting my eldest brother said that
everyone should switch off their
handsets and let’s have some
peace, not knowing my wife
didn’t, at the middle of the
conversation, my wife’s phone rang, she picked it and started
saying ‘hello, hello,’ where
everyone is.
I told her to leave and take the
call that we are talking here,
she told me to mind my business. So instead of her
leaving she got up, backed all
of us and started answering
and laughing and my brother got
angry, went to where she was
and took the phone from her. She stood up and before we
knew what was happening she
slapped my eldest brother on
his face and that was how it all
started . My brother beat the
living day light out of her, and told her she has bitten more
than she can chew.
I must be honest with you, I
never for once told my brother
to stop, my brother himself has
never laid a hand on his wife, his marriage is 25 years old. I
just left the scene, even my
children followed me.
Since we came back, she
parked her thing from our room
to the guest room, she has been living there and I have
been living in the master
bedroom. These days we eat
fast food, she wakes up in the
morning and leaves for work,
because she is a nurse. I just want peace to reign, but my
children are tired of eating fast
food. Last week my son
complained and I had to pay
one woman that sells restaurant
to cook me onugbu soup and nsala, my children’s favorite,
she cooked and brought it, so
me and my sons shared it in a
bowl and put inside the fridge.
That is what we are eating now.
Please your parliamentary people should tell me, is this a
marriage? Don’t see my
quietness as weakness
because my father always tells
us to respect woman, no matter
the amount of provocation. I am 55 years and she is 48 years
old. My eldest brother is 64
years old.
From Annonymous worried
husband.
