“Skye, get up or you’ll be late!” Walt yelled from out in the hallway, and I groaned as glanced at my clock. 7:03am . Ugh. I hate Mondays, they are the worst. Somehow, my eyes snapped shut to ignore the peeps of sunlight beaming through my windows. And I had gotten lost in another trance of sleep.
~Seventeen minutes later…~
“SKYE GET YOUR ASS OUT OF BED NOW, YOU’RE GONNA BE LATE!” My mother barged into my room, pulling the old comforter from my body as I scrambled in confusion to the sudden action.
“Sorry,” I grumbled in annoyance, “Do I have to go to school today?” My Mom rolled her eyes and exhaled loudly trying to keep herself calm, “Yes. Now get up, Walt is going to drive you.”
Hearing that made me spring up from my sleeping position and slam open my closet in hurry. “Nope! There is no way- I’m biking!” I scrambled to pull on an ‘Asking Alexandria’ black t-shirt snugly over my pale dangly body, jumping into some dark red skinnies. My Mom groaned and exited the room. She still wasn’t pleased that I had avoided interaction with Walt.
It’s not like it was my fault he was a dick.
Not even a minute later, I was looping a studded belt through my buckles whilst turning on my ‘morning playlist’ using my toes. Any other normal person would’ve laughed at me, but hey, music is important!
Better off Dead by Sleeping with Sirens came on, and I began to belt the lyrics ignoring the yells from my Mom whom despised the music. Walt knew not to mess with me and my music, otherwise we would get in a big argument…
“How come no one heard her when she said,” I sang, dancing around like an idiot while jumping into my combat boots and brushing out my short and crazed dark-blue hair. “Maybe I’m better off dead! If I was, would it finally be enough! Shut out all those voices in my head! Maybe I’m better off dead! Better off dead, did you hear a word- hear a word I said, this is not where I belong! You’re gonna miss me when I’m gone…”
Quickly, I grabbed my eyeliner I had purchased for $2.78 at the Quickee-Mart down the block, and applied it darkly as I peered at myself through my small hand mirror. I sighed loudly as I was once again displeased with my appearance, as blemishes covered my pale skin.
Hazel eyes stared back at me- staring at this person that was almost unrecognizable compared to her six-year-old-self photo taken in kindergarten. Sleeping with Sirens faded, as the next song came on. I recognized it as ‘I don’t wanna be in love’ by Good Charlotte.
Picking up my bracelets, all advertising my favorite bands like Sleeping with Sirens, Asking Alexandria, Pierce the Veil, Suicide Silence, Escape the Fate, Good Charlotte, Of Mice and Men, Nirvana, Green Day and Panic at the Disco.
Bring Me the Horizon, and Twenty One Pilots are especially some favorites of mine as well, and I have to admit that I do have a soft spot for Alesana, Three Days Grace, My Chemical Romance, The All-American-Rejects, and Black Veil Brides. (DOWN THE LIST LOL! Comment if you recognize this feeling… I was shocked to see how many songs I had downloaded…)
Snorting as I thought over all of my favorite bands, there was such a long list… It’d be hard to list all of them, as hard as you could try. Well… No wonder everyone in my High School called me an emo. I was, to be honest. Deep down, with my dark poetic lonely soul, I was an emo. But emo is short for emotional, and I couldn’t describe myself any better.
My heart ached in guilt as I glanced at the scars covering my wrists; cuts, some of them fresh, others scars that had failed to heal over without leaving behind a mark. If my Mom knew… I’d end up in a mental institution for sure. Quickly I covered them up as best I could with my bracelets, wincing slightly as the rubber came in contact with a fresh cut.
Grabbing my black backpack, I unplugged my music device. (A kindle instead of an iPod because my Mom refused to buy me one…) And grabbed my earbuds continuing to blast the music in my ears as I tucked my kindle in my bag, one earbud in my ear and the other dangling free.
After brushing my teeth, I headed downstairs and glanced at the time to see that I had ten minutes to get to school. If I was going to make it on time, I’d have to leave now.
“Bye Mom, bye Walt, bye Maggie! I’m heading to school!” I yelled, clomping down the stairs and out the door, grabbing my black helmet I had spray-painted in graffiti, and hopping on my matching bike as I raced to school.
I got there right as the bell rang, and I parked my bike and jumped off unplugging my headphones and tucking them in my bag as I bolted to enter the school building and get to my locker.
But like most things,
I wasn’t fast enough.
I hadn’t planned for it to go this far. In fact, I hadn’t planned for any of this at all. They say the best people endure the most pain, and sadly the pain destroys some of the best people. It seems only right for the engagement to be reversed… Right?
Heh, not quite. Just the opposite, actually.
“Skye! Where’s the clouds?” Veronica joked, knowing that I couldn’t stand up for myself. She and her little ‘minions’ all hated me without a doubt. I didn’t respond, which made her angry.
It was difficult to ignore Veronica, but like my second nature it wasn’t that hard to disappear from this world and originate to a land of my own mind’s creation.
I steadied my feet carefully as I continued walking faster, trying to get to my locker before classes started. “What the actual fuck! Don’t ignore me, bitch!” Veronica yelled; her curly black hair bouncing with each word. Her intense blue eyes staring me down. “What do you want….?” I groaned, reaching for my kindle which had fallen out and shoving it back in my bag, lugging myself back up. Veronica rolled her eyes in annoyance.
“What do I want?! You’ve practically ignored me all summer! And- and now you come back, look at you! Blue hair… Emo music? You’re a disgrace!” Veronica was right, I had changed. Prior to the summer, I had long yellow-blonde hair; exceedingly normal clothes, and listened to relevant pop culture. Little did anyone know that the me from last year was faking a smile, all god damn minute and every waking hour I spent pondering my death?
Veronica gestured to the bracelets that ran all up along my right arm, “Oh, and are those the bracelets that you use to cover up your cuts? ” She mocked- little did she know she was actually right. “Pathetic.” She spat, “And I actually thought you were my friend you piece of shit attention whore!”
Tears burned in my eyes, as I gripped my bag tighter in my pale and cold palms. Veronica turned around prepared to storm off, as she was ditching off in the opposite direction she yelled over her shoulder, “Go cut a little deeper, freak!”
Well… Maybe I would be one friend short this year.
Like Lin, Veronica had been one of the ‘friends’ that I had lost due to the lack of communication over the summer. But that was only because Veronica doesn’t like who I am, and I knew that once she found out who I really was on the inside, she would react just like she did.
It was two weeks into the new school year, and still I had struggled to find my way here. This was my first year of high school, so of matter of speaking, it was even harder to be an emo freshman. And apparently at this high school, they weren’t treated very nicely.
Gradually, I had made it to my locker; and quickly fled to class. Later that day was when I would first see him.
----------------------------------------------------