This is my account of what I personally experienced.
We finally got to the 9th month, especially the EDD (Expected
delivery date). We were told it is not always accurate. It is
always plus or minus 2 weeks. We did 3 Different scans and
got 3 different EDD. I knew deep down in me that the baby is
coming on one of these 3 days.
I promised my wife to be with her throughout the ED dates so I
took 7 days off at work. On the first ED date, she experienced
constant pains that made us conclude, this must it. We picked
her things up, stock my car boot thinking the day has come.
We were disappointed when the doctor told us the dilation is
still very small. In fact they could not even admit her on their
bed. They told us to go back home and come back the next
day. I could not cry for her. The pain was so much already.
How are we going to endure the night?
It was hell through the night. Please respect women no matter
how small or young they are. The pain is always a near death
experience.
We got to the hospital the following day, they told us she still
has a long way to go, she has dilated 4cm, but the water has
not broken, no bloody mucus discharge (Never mind
experienced wife and doctors will understand this). I plead with
them to admit her; I could not bear to see her in pains at home.
“Let her be here so she can be under monitor”. They agreed,
gave us our bed and we checked in. A friendly nurse gave us
many hints e.g. she should keep climbing the stairs and lie on
her side whenever she feels like relaxing…e.t.c.
We checked in around 7:30am, at around 4:00pm, she said she
felt something is coming out, we rushed to the ladies where a
ball of water came out, and it was punctured by the nurse. That
was when active labor started.
So they took her to the labor, the nurse gave me a chair to sit
outside. I refused; I said I want to be with her in the Labor
room. We argued, the matron came to convince me they don’t
allow non-technical staff in labor or surgery room. I gave them
drama oooo…She is not going there alone. When the matron
could not bear my arrogance and trouble, she gave me a green
gown, gloves and nose cover, I don’t know what medical
people call them. Na so I enter ooo with Ogboju.
I nearly regretted entering the place, although I got a consoling
end result which made me forget the whole gory experience.
Women.., our mothers are suffering. I was resourceful to the
nurses and maids in the room, whenever they need her to
move to a particular posture, I help her out, clean up blood,
intestinal fluids e.t.c. Jez..I am a personality that hates seeing
blood or watching horrific/bloody movies, accident scenes.
That night was a night of torture for me.
At around 7:20pm, we saw the head of the baby coming after
hundreds of contractions. I saw the hair of my baby, I touched
it down there. But, it was still not coming out after uncountable
pushes. That was then the doctor came in and said “The
mother is getting tired and the baby pulse is fading, so they
needed a CS immediately”. My heart jumped, I felt dejected and
disappointed. I thought “So all my wahala since morning, they
will still have to cut my wife opened. God wetin I do? Is it my
sins or what?”. I could see my wife’s eyeball becoming red with
tears forming. I was crying inside, but I was looking strong and
confident outside to encourage my wife. I turned to the staffs; I
said they should give her 30 minutes more. They refused; they
said they were losing the baby. I shouted on one of them, “IF
YOUR KNIFE EVER TOUCH MY WIFE, I WILL SUE YOUR
ASS! ”. They were shocked by the way I shouted and my
vulgar words. So the doctor agreed to give 30 minutes more.
They placed my wife on oxygen. She told me she could no
longer do it anymore, she is tired. I told her beautiful things, I
told her “If they operate you, we will name the child in this
hospital. All the plans for the naming ceremony we have made
will be a waste. The cloths, the shoe, the goat meat, and the
caterers we had in mind to contract…the owambe. People will
come here to grieve with us instead of congratulating us. Even
if we are discharged before the naming ceremony, you won’t
be able to dance on that day”.
I don’t know where she got the energy from, she just pushed
and pushed like never before, baby head just popped out.
The nurse pulled her out (yes it’s a she). She was also looking
tired, not breathing, but alive, they quickly rushed her under
one UV light, pass oxygen pipe to her nose. She was still not
breathing, after few minutes she just opened her mouth to cry.
I just knelt down thanking God, singing praises. By the way,
the team commended me that day; they said they have never
seen a man do what I did that night. And my faith is strong.
It was not a palatable experience, should I talk about intestinal
fluid, discharges, bloods? She was a first timer, her VG could
not accommodate the size of the baby, they had to cut her and
blood started gushing out, I nearly fainted at that point. I also
monitor the process of stitching her cuts. It was gory. Child
delivery is not childsplay or for the faint of heart. Respect to our
mothers, nurses and doctors.