I don't 'know' who wrote this piece. It is worth
reading perhaps.
MOST IMPORTANT THING IN MARRIAGE!
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Uncle Tunde grinned when he saw his daughter,
Aduni and the husband Kehinde walked into the
house. The old man, was on one of his rare visits
to his in-law. He had to succumb after several
pleas from his in-law to move from his confines of
Ijebu to Lagos to spend the Easter Holidays. This
his in-law believed he needed to comfort him from
the old man’s loneliness after his wife’s demise
three months ago.
After dinner that evening, he whispered to his son in
law that if they don’t mind, he would love to have a
quick word with the couple after the children have
gone to bed.
By 9pm, the couple was back to the dinner table to
hear what the old man had to say.
He started by asking them a simple question “What
is the most important thing in your life Aduni ? She
replied, “Daddy, it is the kids oo, they mean
everything to me”. He then turned and asked
Kehinde , the son in law the same question, he also
beaming with pride said :it is the kids of course”
they are the reason why I work so hard to ensure
they have a better life”
Uncle Tunde replied, well said my children, I don’t
mean to intrude on how to run your family, but I
believe there is a fundamental error you would need
to correct. He said “ I have observed how much you
both love your kids and dedicate all your time for
them.
Forgive me if I have eavedropped a couple of
times, but doesn’t all your conversation bother on
the kids? The coupled stared sheepishly in
admission to the assertion.
He continued, I am a poultry farmer, and the
biggest egg supplier in my district. I make my
money by the quantity of eggs sold. That said, my
priority has always been providing optimal care for
the chicken. Because I know that when the chicken
are healthy and productive, the eggs will come
automatically. If I start to ignore the chicken, the
eggs will also suffer.
He pointed to Kehinde and said, “as a husband, the
most important person in your life should be your
wife and vice versa. It cannot be the kids. They are
just products of the marriage. If you learn to take
care of each other very well, your kids would grow
up healthy and strong, but if you ignore each other,
brace yourself up for dysfunctional kids in the
future. The two of you are the foundation of this
family. If you suffer any form of crack, the whole
house will go down. So please make time for
yourself and treat each other as VIPs and the kids
will be just fine.
This has been the secret of the fruitful union
between your mum and I for over 50 years till death
took her from me. The old man couldn’t help it but
shed tears at this stage. He thanked the couple for
their time and excused himself to his room.
Many married couples can identify with this story,
where the focus shifts 100% to the kids and barely
have time for each other. They later are amazed
they lose the magic connection between them. If
care is not taken, those connection needs gets
outsourced, thereby opening up your marriage to all
sorts of strange elements.
Give the kids the love and attention they deserve
but not at the expense of each other. You are the
real deal. The kids are just bonus!!!
Have a blessed week