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******KAST****** *SHORT STORY BY HIM*

******KAST****** *SHORT STORY BY HIM*

By Khola46 in 13 Dec 2015 | 13:59
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Khola46 Khola46

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A short funny fiction story by this small kid...Don't mind my mistakes though I'll try to caution myself but no one is perfect...Any names or place mention was just an imagination by me...
*Stay Tune*
13 Dec 2015 | 13:59
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Ride on
13 Dec 2015 | 14:07
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I have already taken my seat
13 Dec 2015 | 14:08
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Oya!!!!!! Clear road mah sit for high table as usual... Khola bring it on
13 Dec 2015 | 14:23
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Gboooom!!! My jet jex landed. Mek una show o. Baba wan [s]post[/s] story. :-) . . V.V.V.V.V.I.P's List... @Coolval222-2 @Tenniebenson @Khola46 @Wiseman @Ibrams @Johnysky @Pizzaro @Swtharyomi @Wyse-one @Eddy @Delight @Pweety @Mray @Jummybabe @Babe4biola @Sofia @Ritagold @Kuks @Originalannchilexdel @Fridex @Frank @Frankkay @Simzy @Pheranmmie041 @Temmyjoy @Chriswayne @Evanz @Itzshaxee @Mecuze @Skookum @Kingson1 @Donmikie @Kingsbest @T-Dak @Charlywizzy @Charliebryn @Hardeywummy @Japhola @Konphido @Emmyrexx @Adura @Tholartee @Nextangel @Blessedgirl @Ebube @Jenifa @Jclash @Taiwo @Chomyline @Lawman @Tinagabe @Christiana @Itmrabzeez @Johnoscar @Precy @Timmy @Dabcy @Ikeholuwa1 @Besty @Starlet @Okklad @Angeleniola @Ewomazeal @Mizleemah @Blessfelicity222 @Anitcham @Stephanie @Lollybabe1 @Dahcutebae @Rhennyjay @Geeadore @Tiffany1 @Tonia @Hameyeenat @Inemlove @Promzy @Mohjisolah @Jencute @Jenny @Doublewealth @John451 @Kniphemi @Vibratingwind @Emmanesth @Horpheyehmy @Valking1 @Pweety @Kpumpy @Justify @Maurice @Jummy @Thankmic @Christopher @Anita @Phinebraim @Kedike @Kemkit @Gracy @Saintkenz @December12 @Promise @Sylvia @Bsam @Portable @Steph @Aarti @Olaking3 @Harddy @Blakstudd @Prince @Invincible @Mhzzrblayse @Azeeco @Temmymofrosh @Sandra @Sandy @Kaysmart22 @Cherryserah @Sexynikky1994 @Youngestprince @Davick @Semilore @Oyindamola @Dhemilade1 @Mature @Pearl @Roes @Franklin @Kolababs @Hollar @Smilie @Borwerleh @Iksqueency @Loveth @Funmilayo1 @Okklad @Nizzy @Flames @Vict-Vames @Peace @Sirp081 @Kristen @Kingsengine @Aaron @Tony @Ruth @Romancelord @Itzshaxee @Olamy4fun @Abrahamdking @Flamerouz @Crusher @Stanny39 @John @Softtouch @Onahsunday631 @Jeddy @Sonshine @Sirgentle @Vizkid @Hoelhay @Pharm-vickymears @Teesolid @Omoyemmy @Olarach @Daxking @Krizzy @Softie @Holarbordah @Ele @Firstladyontop @Obaby @Sergentmax @Mhizdaofot @Ariketemmy @Saraya @Eminem @Laurasteve299 @Gambola @Monadisu @Dazzlingangel @Donyas @C-Roderick @Cookey @Isabella1 @Chisomsophia @Mrfabulous @Henry @Mhizzthessy @Millz @Bishops10 @Kreepyink @Olaniyiadeshina @Gracedkyenny @Hardeyhorlar9 @Holaryinkhar @Inemeka @Abevica @Olami @Beryl @Humblelion @Natasha9976 @Hartuny @Emergencia @Paula4eva @GiftGodiva @Divatimmy @Finestberyl @Sapiens @Ahmad @Ele1 @Ferdinard @Festoza006 @Sharpzender @Uncleba426 @Paje @Jenny123 @Pemamezi @Detector @Pweetyfizzy @Willingyung @Napster @Greg-billz @Valentinelv @Hayanfeoluwa @Teju1 @Dgreat @Prestigiousfirstlady @Petersandra121 @Jenny1 @Bryten50 @Fallancy @Rosey @Jimmyjab @Oluwanifemi @Everybody come ooo
13 Dec 2015 | 14:29
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Oyah keep it flowing,. Lemme call some pple. @pizzaro, @desire, @jummybabe, @pheranmmie041, @ele1, @frankkay, @ebube, @skookum, @TinaGabe, @originalann, and others. [color =yellow]make una show for here sharp sharp[/color]
13 Dec 2015 | 14:32
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------Episode 1------ . . Sitting infront of a two room apartment one sunny afternoon was a guy with a 6.3fit tall...His look could be term as someone been worried on something...that guy is no one else but me...I'm khola by name(let's keep the intro for another day)... I was down there reminiscing on how tonight games between the two teams I always took their side anytime they got matches to play seperately, though they are from different country(England & Spain)...tonight will be different story because I'm on home team side and thats Chelsea Vs Barcelona... Being on my thought and suddenly heard my name called... ."Kholyy". I found myself looking up dejectly and it turns to Shola, the only guy that understand me out of the three guys I live with making us 4... He just came back from market... I just kept looking at him without any reply... "Watxup Guy" he said again recieving no reply... "Guy, ah been deh greet you since you deh look like me...shey ah resemble person for your family?" he said without swallowing the siliva he had instored from his mouh. "Nah your Mama ah deh see for your face nah.. Mumu guy, you don bath me with H2SO4 weh God use as blessing for your mouth" I replied while standing up. "Abeg, shey you buy garri make ah soak jhor" I couldn't help but showing him how hungry I am both with word and action... "Wehrey, as your work deh pay much sowtey you carry garri money give me...nah hunger kuku finish your village people" he said and rushed inside without waiting for reply...I stood up and follow the parrot inside... TBC.
13 Dec 2015 | 14:38
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Am here thanks @pizzaro
13 Dec 2015 | 14:39
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Ride on,tanx@pizzaro 4 d mention.
13 Dec 2015 | 14:52
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Ah don arrive oo. Tanx @pizzaro
13 Dec 2015 | 14:52
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@Skookum dear oya cum o nd @sofia frnd show face o
13 Dec 2015 | 14:56
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Am right here@softie
13 Dec 2015 | 15:00
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[b]Tnks @pizzaro d H[sub]2[/sub]SO[sub]4[/sub] na conc one abi na dil.[/b]
13 Dec 2015 | 15:11
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Thanks @pizzaro
13 Dec 2015 | 15:26
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----Episode 2--- . . Cooking has been schedule daily, two people in the kitchen and today is Shola and I turn...I like that guy but there is a disease I wish to help him cure and thats "talk-active"... He could speak for the nation, I wonder why he has not been noticed by those politicians, he would be more useful to them when its campaign time...I couldn't follow him to market cause the experience I had when I was young can't be forget so easily...I was sent to buy Ponmo that day...being the loyal soon I am...I rushed to the market like a ferrari used in "Formula 1" but I couldn't buy the goods because all the sellers locked their door without any single sign of people around...I even thought strike has spread into the world of traders...as I was helding home dejectedly I remember all of a sudden that a woman beside market place always laid Ponmo outside her house..so I decide to check on her...on my way back to market I saw a naira note along the opposite side(my eye was like a hawk eyes), I can't let that slide so I cross the other side..Unknown to me a man is coming through the same path..as I bend to pick the note...the thunderous slap that land on me got me paralyzed for 5mins...I knew the man was someone to be in his ward but nobody could help him after my 3days on sickbed(how I got home..only gods know)...back to my present state. I will be the one cooking today because the last time Shola made a soup...I almost run crazy if not that Ade & Tolu was there to help calm me down...He went on in putting almost an half of a sack of Andrew Liver Salt into the soup...being a glutton...I ate the soup first unknown what it holds on for me(nah scene to remember)... "Abeg, where you put the ingredient nah?" I asked without looking up.. "ah don swallow ahm to roast my intestine nah" he answered like a fool I think he is... "mtcheew, them don swear give you problem" I said as I approach him where he sat beside our everlasting cupboard, its an everlasting because Ade who brought the cupboard told us that his greatgrandfather gave his grandfather as the only property he had and his grandfather left it for his father when he was about to died...and his father gave him as birthday gift...I couldn't help but laugh the day he told us... Poverty has turn to Gene in their family... Tbc.
13 Dec 2015 | 15:39
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Lol... @Pizzaro Funny You.. Thanks Bro... . . @Tenniebenson I hope you've checked the seat well...if them carry bad chair put there...ah go vex o...
13 Dec 2015 | 15:44
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Ayam here @Temmyjoy thanks ya. Na grandpa dy write make i sidwn wella.
13 Dec 2015 | 16:06
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*Following*tanks 4 d cal @pizzaro oya show face oo @ebube @ele1 @pheranmmie041 @pemamezi
13 Dec 2015 | 17:27
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Space traffic... Bt i made it just in time... My [b] space bike[/b] is superb.. Oya make una shift 4 front i want sleep... (*sit* i mean)
13 Dec 2015 | 17:50
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Ride on mr@khola46
13 Dec 2015 | 18:41
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So funny jst lyk d writter
13 Dec 2015 | 19:02
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[i]@pizzaro tanks for de iv I don land wit my ak47 o no my range rover sport..... if I hear say I don enter am before na for my last dream I saw it last sef... @khola ore mi to sure nice gud to have back and back wit better jollyment .. but no vex I have to tell u dis as my pp na u see DAT ur gal way her name be @tenniebenson she don dump u o for won guy way him.name na @vict-vames I jst say make I tell u no make u kuku no in time o[/i]
13 Dec 2015 | 20:49
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Waoooo great na boss kholly dey giv us story to calm our nerve,oya gbosa make u ride on @temmyjoy am right here babe ..
14 Dec 2015 | 01:09
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Tanks lady and qentlemen 4 callinq... The tori dey funny like u @khola46 ride on non-stop
14 Dec 2015 | 03:33
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@Frankkay na amebo go kill u... Me nd Khola get agreement.. No shook hand 4 our matter o... . . . . . Khola I dey ur back like hunch... Ride on..
14 Dec 2015 | 04:45
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---Episode 3--- . . Though the cupboard look so clean outward, rat had made it a bin inward.. As I approach him, he thought I'm going to react on what he said and he stood up and walk far from it but I have different mission on mind and thats to take what I called "Shola worst Enemy"(Salt) inside the cupboard but couldn't find it there. "where the salt weh Ade say him buy yesterday nah" I said like a question but its not "Shey Ade weh say him go keep the money to buy groundnut when we deh go watch football today" he said without being asked "Ehen, how today match go be nah??" he added to his speech which game me no option than to answer him as a true fan "Blue go win today nah, you know say nah home we deh" I said while searching for an unlost salt. "Guy, where Ade & Tolu go nah?" he asked as he make his way back to sit on the chair "Shey you no get them number, call them make them tell you..you deh fight?" I answered like a typical Nigerian will do "Nah your papa put card here weh ah go use call them..ode! "ehen, you remember the party weh ah tell you" he added to his first statement probably to avoid getting my own reply for it "Yeah, wetin do ahm??" I asked. "Nothing o..nah today them go hold ahm"...its a party I vowed to be there...Not just that I want to be there, I'm eager to be there cause the four of us are going to be there... I love being with the trio not just for who they are but the name people do call us which is "KAST"(the initial letter of our names)... "wow, but you tell me say nah on Sunday and today be Thursday..How nah?" I asked with mixed feelings of joy and confussion. "since nah me change ahm, why you no go put me on hot seat deh ask jamb question..make you go iron your them-dash me cloth, nah today" he fired back at me which got me little furious "Wehrey, you turn me to your brother weh deh wear your papa cloth go show and..??" he couldn't let me finish the statement "Eh!, it don do. go check soup for fire jhor".. ..After cooking the saltless soup, Shola made amala with the little amount of flour he bought and we were set to leave the kitchen for the gods to clean... A step inside the room got me shocked and surprised...two people lying down like a wolf that fought with lion and got wounded... Shola on the other hand quickly ran back to the kitchen shouting for help... I was scared to my bone cause Tolu fought with a guy in the neighbourhood, I thought he came for revenge with his gang... the two wolf in human looked up and turns to Ade & Tolu... Ehn what digest from my throat could not be taking away by ocean.... My fear switched to anger seeing the duo turning us to something to laugh on, if killing isn't a crime, I would have love to be a murderer that moment... "Guy, wetin happen weh you deh do like say Niger-Delta has arrived" I could hear Tolu asked amidst of his laugh. "Nah your mama ah offended ontop say ah give your sister belle...nah her ah think you be.. decent madman" I answered with the little breathe I had in me... TBC.
14 Dec 2015 | 05:41
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Lol @Frankkay Thats how we roll...we are both on a note "There is love in Sharing"...just deh look as it deh go... . Thanks Bro... . . . @Tenniebenson Shey our agreement talk say we could sleep over night anytime we wish ehn? where were you last night(in p-square tone)??...
14 Dec 2015 | 05:47
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[i]@tenniebenson ***thong out*** even if it's amebo na de true o but DAT khola sef don de vex me y u no go descend on her lol @khola46 na now u come ask her for me pulis....... ride on bro k did ur pigin English sef dey give head each to read well gud one following observing mood activated**[/i]
14 Dec 2015 | 06:02
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Nice ride. Present
14 Dec 2015 | 09:00
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Following
14 Dec 2015 | 09:00
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---Episode 4--- . . . I wonder why he has not been castrated with the scissors mouth he has..He could cut people's heart with his word... "Guy, No talk wetin ah no like o" he said with a little anger showing off his face. "We are realy sorry we couldn't call on you when we arrived, we were tired and also don't want to interrupt your discusion in the kitchen" Ade said with a symphatize face, it seem he knew how it is to be in fear... "No sorry them jhor, them turn kitchen to t.v station and start a talking programme, only God knows how the soup go be, water for don pass ingredient ontop them siliva" Tolu said as Shola berge in with full force to start what he knew how to do best "You two herbivous, them don swear follow you enter toilet, why you go enter like a dumming and kept mute like a faulty radio, you made me run into the kitchen like that, God save you, I ran into the kitchen to search for weapon, if you no talk ni, ah for use you cook our soup, ah thought say nah thieves.. Khola, you remember that man weh..." I couldn't just stand and wait for him to finish "Aha... Abeg, it don do...mouth no deh pain you??" "You went to search for weapon and you are shouting for help" Ade asked with a smile "No mind him, shey nah this long gone t.v them go thief, him no know say him papa no get property" Tolu said which make us burst into laugh. "ah swear wehrey ni e, we get property pass all people weh deh in your family registery" Shola said while standing and shaking like a jelly fish...seems thats the sickness he got from the fear earlier on... "Guys, Shola tell me say them don re-schedule the party we he told us to today ooo" I said as I make my ways to sit beside our ghost telivision...its been almost 5months now it go defaulted and no one is ready to repair it with his own money... "How could it be??, why today of all day??" Ade asked as if he won't be going... "You sef deh follow Khola asked jamb question?" Shola said with a cool nerve which shows he had started getting himself together... "Shey, we deh go?" asked by scissors mouth. "No oo, we deh go visit your mama weh deh do wedding today in your village nah" Shola said which gain him a throat-thirsty punch from Tolu.....Oh, I forgot to tell you something about Tolu, he hated ever being called village boy...he can't stand it if someone refers his hometown to village...and the truth is(nah village he come from--silently said)... Seeing how the punch landed on his cheek I remember immediately that its been long I watched wrestlemania and here is my chance to watch one live,so, I started encouraging them to fight.. "Chaiii, see as the punch sound like a train horn, ah swear Undertaker no fit take such punch and still get reason to stay calm" hearing those words grew Shola's anger and he launched at Tolu... Tbc.
14 Dec 2015 | 11:45
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Hahaha Khola na God qo forqive you. If am asked, i would say u're the cause of that fiqht cos of the incitinq statements u made.!
14 Dec 2015 | 17:21
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@khola.... Y u come put mouth 4 wetin wey no concern u... C dat ur statement don draw battle line 4 d two.
14 Dec 2015 | 18:48
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I just sit here dey laugh my mind out. Too funny! Nice job @khola46
15 Dec 2015 | 07:26
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---Episode 5--- . . . There is something about Friendship that do encourage me to associate with friends(good ones) and be friendly to those we might not relate much, thats "Fight"... A friendship without fight will only last for a while.. Even the best friend on earth do fight(teeth & tongue), they are always together in one room...but they do fight whenever they both see sweet things...the most important thing in the fight was to caution the whole body...after that..they became friend immediately after the fight... Thats just like KAST... the friends with different behaviour but still understand each other no matter how much they fought... ...As Shola launched at Tolu to make my wish come to pass...a devil-in-human intervene and kill my wish on its ways to accomplish land.. "Will you two just stop all this, can't you see Khola was just here to poison your hearts with words so you could fight each other??" Ade said as he stood to seperate the two morons... I think the morons can still think with their brain because instantly they got seperated and silence took over the room for almost 5mins... "Please guys, this is 5.30pm and we had somewhere to go by 6.30pm, won't we start preparing before time runz out??" I broke the silence and I fighting for my freedom from where I sat but I couldn't help but fall back and stood up with full force as I saw Shola smiling.. I was so shocked because nothing funny happen why would my friend be smiling... "why are you smiling?" Ade asked after noticing that I glue my eyes on Shola... "ah... Modaran(simply mean I'm in trouble), my friend don craze??" I said as I thought Tolu's punch has caused some damage to his head.. the he replied "wehrey, nah your in-law go run mad, you wan know wetin deh make me smile?" asking no one in particular simply no one answered him cause we all are in shock expecialy Mr Muhammed Ali, he almost shed tears and he look horrified... "Since ah met you all, Khola never talk fluent English like he talk ahm right now, nah ihn make me remember my junior school teacher when ah deh secondary school, nah explanation she go think she deh do, ah swear she go deh use fluent English encourage us to fail all subject...nah pidgin she fit talk" he added to his words as he always did which took almost my precious 3minutes away from me... "I know already say Tolu don damage your brain with punch" I said with a croaky voice which got the two herbivous(Tolu & Ade) into laugh... "wehrey ni e(simply means you are insane) for sure" he said but I couldn't wait to have another section of arguementative essay, so, I made my way outside to search for any available bucket to fetch water. "Guy, abeg, go dish the food for kitchen, we go eat before setting off oo" I sanged to them as a glutton I am as I exit the door... TBC...
15 Dec 2015 | 08:10
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@khola46 na u be the writer of dis harilious story...ride on bro.,
15 Dec 2015 | 11:03
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[color =purple]Following[/color]
15 Dec 2015 | 14:31
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Lol,good frnds are always fun to be with,ride on bro @khola46
15 Dec 2015 | 14:36
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Following this till the very end
15 Dec 2015 | 15:08
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Funny dudes N E X T please
15 Dec 2015 | 15:53
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was not invited so therefor ghostmode activated
16 Dec 2015 | 00:23
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Came late buh meehhnNn.....diz got me rolling
16 Dec 2015 | 01:40
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i dey enjoy dis ur story @Khola.....
16 Dec 2015 | 02:53
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@khola46 could u imagine me missing ur story ..... Xo xo hilarious ...nice one u gat here
16 Dec 2015 | 03:02
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very funny...nobody kuku invite bt i don show..welldone @Khola46
16 Dec 2015 | 04:05
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U guys are hillarious [KAST]
16 Dec 2015 | 04:38
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---Episode 6--- . . Ade preparation for the party was like preparing for a wedding with Abacha's granddaughter(just to show people that Abacha still has decendant..though ah no know him decendant and ah no wan know them)... We were still waiting for Ade infront of the house and suddenly Tolu pushed to talk with a complaint "See, eaten that amala nah like giving my worms poison, my stomach deh sound" he said as he took his hand into his mouth "Shey your mama fit cook sweet soup as me??" I asked with faint smile looking straight forward toward the road to view any ladies that pass by "The food no good??, then why you deh toothpick like say nah your city canteen you visit??" Shola throws at Tolu with care without mentioning village to avoid getting another punch, I don't blame him, I can't aford to recieve the punch..well, if he doesn't took his word gently...That would have been good for me.. "wetin concern your papa if ah use turning stick turn my whole mouth..person matter nah yours?" Tolu answered without removing his hand from where it stuck to, I couldn't help but laugh out loud. "wetin bring light come your house weh you deh shine teeth like maize weh them plant beside road??" Shola said amidst of his own laugh. "ah swear, them fit use me advertize close-up not you weh your teeth possess locust color" I was saying before Shola interupt "why them no go use you advertize maxam, since them go first show your stinky-present teeth and after them wash ahm like rag, them go show ahm again and that go make them win people heart".. as we are busy with our "I disagree" programme, I was lost to the arguement to the extent I couldn't heard Tolu calling for my attention until he slapped my hand forcefully. "aha. wetin ah do the king of your city?" I said with little anger...Although I was a bit angry, I have to pick my words from dictionary with caution orelse I might mistakenly mention the word "village" which could gain me a free ticket to hospital cause I can't stand Tolu's anger... "ah deh call you since make you see one fine babe ontop bike, you deh busy with parrot-like in nature talk" Tolu said using style to remind Shola of who he is.. "if nah swear them swear for both of you, e no go reach this level 15...you turn arguement to job..mtchw" he added to show how hurtful he felt by not giving him my attention when needed... As he finished saying all his vocabulary, Ade came out with a killing smile...there is so much I love about that guy...if atall he was been born a female, I would have married her with joy... the most handsome guy among us...I remember how I begged him to help me asked a lady out in our neighbourhood.. Not that I couldn't do it but an handsome doing it will be more better but my guy just came back saying gilbrish I couldn't understand...oh he brought me the lady's name... "whats happening here" he asked while approaching us......one more thing about him...he's the only guy that never speak pidgin out of us...maybe he added that to his charm only God knows...But that guy realy look awesome...the only thing I dislike about him is the way he dress...Not how he look in the dress but the time he always used to get dressed...I wonder how he manage to always meet up lectures when he was in school... "No mind this parrot and hawk jawe...them fit talk walk pass the destination before noticing...two babarians" Tolu said still showing his anger "me no know why you carry fire for head ontop say ah no look a lady, shey nah you go go meet her if atall ah call her" I said with a smile "Nah ontop bike the lady deh sef...why he no call her if he deh sure say he wan make you see her...he even suppose run to catch the bike sef..ah no know why he go deh vex ontop wetin he guilty on" Shola said as we all kept looking at his mouth. "You can never change...your talking is too much.caution yourself dude.. Please, let's go. its 6:40pm already" Ade said refering to Shola. "Your dressing deh long, caution yourself mheeeen" Shola answerd back mimicking Ade's voice.... Tbc.....
16 Dec 2015 | 10:11
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Just dey laff here.... [b]funny dudes[/b]
16 Dec 2015 | 11:25
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Lolxx. Ride on bro.
16 Dec 2015 | 12:39
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ghostmode
16 Dec 2015 | 13:18
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lolz..
16 Dec 2015 | 16:02
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Dis una grp na comedian una be
16 Dec 2015 | 16:04
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Ah jst dey laf
16 Dec 2015 | 16:48
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What a funny story
16 Dec 2015 | 19:13
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Following
17 Dec 2015 | 01:18
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Cool pals
17 Dec 2015 | 01:48
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U really got me loolzing
17 Dec 2015 | 04:07
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i dey feel ur story oo @khola46
17 Dec 2015 | 06:52
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---Episode 7--- . . . Sometimes I wonder if Nigeria was the only country on earth, reason is that. the best country that describe what LIFE means is Nigeria... Happiness today, worrying tommorow...things keep changing from negative to positive and positive to negative...If I had a chance to write a poem or proverb for world to see...then "Life can simply be define as Nigeria" will be my first words to write... When we were busy chit-chatting, I could see the road filled with car and bike but as we got to where to call a bike with-in a second, the road has turn to a mortuary without any motor or bike passing... "Nah wetin ah talk be this...person weh no deh dress quick no deh reach them destination in time...you take dressing as priority ontop a party what if you wan go meet your in-law??" Shola said suddenly but got no reply. I would have reply him but I was busy rubbing where Tolu slapped me earlier on... "I think we need to get going by walking because standing here mean no meaning" Ade said while leaving us there... "abeg, shey we go trekk ni??" I heard Tolu asked with curiosity face "No, we go fly...call your papa jet make it come carry us" I answered back as we followed Ade... ..We walked almost a mile from where we are before seeing bikes to call...We called on two and bounced on it with me and Shola on one and the other two herbivous on the second one...I couldn't even remember how Shola and I grow fond for each other(not what you think oo...been best of a friend) because we met not more than a year now..the story to that is for another day... The ride was like hell for me because the parrot behind me just kept on bathing me with saliva as he was busy interrogating the bike man...to my surprise, the bike man was answering him like a criminal... "Bro, how much them deh sell petrol now" the fool asked like he had something to do with petrol price "them don deh sell ahm 105naira per litre" the man answered with joy...I wonder why he felt joyous with the amount or was it just because he answered one babarian... "and how much you don gain today?" he asked feeling good as he saw someone to talk with "9ja no easy oo...ah don deh for road since morning nah 1k ah get" the man answered without even thinking twice...I don't know why some people do always feel free to put themself into trouble...assumming Shola asked that question to gain clue on how much we would rob from him...he would have been penniless the momment he answered... The two brothers in parrot land kept on with their discusion until we reach our destination...I can't help but thanking God for surviving through hell... Making our ways into the party avenue.. I heard people hailing our names as usual...KAST is the name we got from a party we went to...we were on our seat gisting and and the MC was asking people to come on stage to sing and dance...suddenly called on us throwing us a question "What's your name Guys??".. "we are KAST by name" he got answered by Ade...that guy possess many thing you could die for...We were asked to come on stage together and dance while one of us hold the micro-phone and sing a song...I don't know how to dance which gave me no option than to sing...we sing and dance to people's satisfaction and "KAST" got known just a night......wonderful day it is..... Back to present.. But seems something is missing and thats ladies presence.. "Guys, shey ladies no allow come here?" I asked as we kept approaching them... "How many of your sister you bring come here??" Tolu answered showing no expression. "E go be say ladies never arrive yet...them go soon come" I heard Shola's voice...Seems he realy enjoy the ride cause his smiles was like someone's crying face... We greeted the people we met there and I went to take a seat... TBC.
17 Dec 2015 | 08:27
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boring
17 Dec 2015 | 12:48
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ride on
17 Dec 2015 | 14:47
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Interesting.
17 Dec 2015 | 15:20
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Cool N E X T
17 Dec 2015 | 15:59
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following...i lke d reply tolu gav u wen u dey ask abt babes
17 Dec 2015 | 17:40
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Next.....
17 Dec 2015 | 17:49
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@sodja is nt necessary u read:-P
17 Dec 2015 | 18:12
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nice
17 Dec 2015 | 19:22
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pls..next,interesting
17 Dec 2015 | 19:28
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Ok,go on
18 Dec 2015 | 01:35
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@sodja ... Ur mama's left nyash boring .... Do u mean he should stop posting it???? If u dont like it go check anoda story
18 Dec 2015 | 02:26
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@sodja ... Ur mama's left myash boring ... Which one av u written???? Be careful ooo... Stupid goons dat can't encourage writers should be blocked from commenting sef
18 Dec 2015 | 02:28
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Lol... @Crusher Bro, you should know well that Sodja was trying to gain people's attention...you just gave her what she needed......and thats your precious time and attention...ignoring people like them is better than replying them.......I realy appreciate your support.. You are the best Bro... Kamsahamnida. I'm grateful bro... ... Thanks so much to the people that still read my story no matter how boring it is...I'm grateful...
18 Dec 2015 | 04:53
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People like Sodja are bound to be in a community......
18 Dec 2015 | 05:00
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--Episode 8-- . . . Couple of minutes after taking a seat at a corner side I started developed running stomach which made me regret never yielding to Shola's advice while eaten...... "as you deh rush hot amala like this, it go affect you o" he said but the glutton demon in me couldn't let me listen to his words... Busying changing my sitting possition I heard a voice but couldn't recognize it probably because of the condition I am presently.. "Guy, them babes still no arrive yet??" raising my head up and I see the owner approaching me with a chair in his hand and it turns to Shola... "aaah. abeg make you no come add to my problem jawe" I thought to myself.. "see, ah fit know where toilet deh" I asked avoiding his question because giving him answer will be like a green light for him to continue asking or saying stupid things... "mah ask that guy, ah deh come" he said pointing at a guy... he returned back with good news......I took it as good news because I've turn to a source of water within the little time I spent sitting.. "nah that place it deh" he said but couldn't hold his tongue and added "wetin happen to you nah??". "nothing do me, or you wish say make something do me??" I asked standing up "abeg, where Tolu and Ade go??" I added to my question. "ah deh ask wetin turn you to a hen weh no get feather in hammatan period, you deh ask person from me...nah the two go be your solution abi..." "it don do oo...aha.. abeg free me" I cut him short as I added to the speed rate leaving him behind... ...The more I tried to quickly exit the bad-egg like toilet with an odour that could help in increasing the rate of the stomach disorder I had the more I got stuck with feaces... suddenly I heard a knock followed by Shola's voice. "wetin you deh excret since nah...even if nah intestine, it fit finish for stomach by now" I couldn't answered him because I was once told to always kept mute while inside the toilet simply for health sake. "Khola!!, you deh there alive??" he said still no reply.. "make ah go call people here oo...death don visit one family pikin here" he said trying to leave "You don craze...nah your brother weh deh Abeokuta go die while in toilet, shey nah this toilet weh be like your mama kitchen ah go deh talk from...mtchw" I said as I exit the toilet. "where you deh go" he asked trying to pull me back as I walk pass him. "ah deh go my room nah" I answered trying to let him know how foolish his question sound "ladies don plenty there and you wan go in looking like a mad man??" "you sure??" I asked while trying to make myself look normal "no. ah no sure, deh go when you reach there you go know" he answered back.. I re-arrange my dressing mode and we held to the venue together.. "guy, thats the lady weh Tolu wan make you see that time" Shola said pointing to a lady as we got to the venue. I'm so amazed seeing a beauty but set aback with what was written boldly on her light-green top she wore "DON'T MESS WITH ME".. I wonder if she customized it by herself or the dress was made like that... "so, nah miss don't mess with me Tolu wan make ah mess with, he wan make ah enter dark house". I said as we approach a guy that call on Shola.. "Guys, how far nah??" the guy greeted with a voice that almost brought back my just survive problem(stomach disorder)...the tone sound like when a demon is asking for blood in a Yoruba movie... I tried ansewering him and leave him with the king of dialogue(Shola) because I couldn't stand the voice... As people do says "everything works together for good", as I left them for good, I sighted my neighbourhood crush I once told Ade too help me out on....This lady is dam.n beautiful like before...she's even extra cute tonight(Ladies can be atimes)...though Ade didn't complete his mission but still I do get along with her anytime we came ran into ourself on the street or where we always fetch drinking water... I put on a smile and approach her... TBC...
18 Dec 2015 | 05:02
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Following
18 Dec 2015 | 05:39
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Cool next pls
18 Dec 2015 | 09:57
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Next please
18 Dec 2015 | 09:58
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confused
18 Dec 2015 | 10:13
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Following
18 Dec 2015 | 10:27
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following
18 Dec 2015 | 11:58
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Nice hilarious story..i can't fit to laugh.
18 Dec 2015 | 12:07
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*Pacard*
18 Dec 2015 | 12:41
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@khola46 ... At least itx beta as we've put her in her place
18 Dec 2015 | 12:45
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Following bumper 2 bumper...no space at all
18 Dec 2015 | 12:51
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Ha! At finally last i don reach here with laugh o. Wetin i take like d story b say even pesn wey no go skol go understand am. Abeg carry d go o @khola46
18 Dec 2015 | 13:13
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followinq keenly...
18 Dec 2015 | 14:21
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am here
18 Dec 2015 | 15:43
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dey seal i jst d follow lyk sheep
18 Dec 2015 | 18:03
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@Crusher You are right bro... Thanks for being here with me... Kamsahamnida...
19 Dec 2015 | 05:59
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---Episode 9--- . . . Taking a seat beside her with greetings but got no reply... Seems she was lost in her thought probably she's somehow sick.. her look was like that of a confused Sodja(Soldier) with an empty hand facing an enemy with Ak-47 in a battle...lol(death has knocked the door for that soldier be that)... "Hi Sandra" I said again but a bit louder she could even heard if she went into slumber land.. "Oh, Hello" she said as she got back from her thought but it seems she hasn't recognise the owner of the voice, to ....as I was taught that a man must make himself look responsible infront of his crush with all possible means...so, I had to express myself in plain English.. "You don't even know when I got here.. whats wrong?. you looked bothered" I said with caring voice.. "WOW!" she exclaimed which got me shocked as I wondered whats so amazed seeing me in a party... "Khola, its you...so, you guys are also here?" she added to her exclamation.. "see question.. no be me, nah my twin...mtchwe... we guys deh your room not here" I thought to myself inwardly. "yeah, its me.. we got here some couple of minutes ago" I answered her question calmly. "Oh.. Thats good...where are the other guys?" she asked. "somewhere having fun" I said and added "I saw a figure that resemble you from afar and decide to clear my curiosity. thats why I came by and true to my sightness...its you" I finished while pointing at nowhere in particular. "Thanks for that dear" I heard her says.. "Why are you all alone here when the dance floor is blooming" I asked with a feelings of excitement...its a grace that I could discuss with a plain English...Don't think I'm that dull(I'm a graduate waiting for his call letter to serve his father's land) but parrot(Shola) has made me what I become(we all are in the same level except Ade whom had already served his father land)... "I'm waiting for someone" she answered (<>in my mind<> ehn.. someone??. nah lady go be... orelse if nah guy...nah wheelbarrow them go use carry him go visit dark home). "uhmm..may I know who that is??" I asked like a jealous crush. "Did you wish to know?" she answered back with question. "if ah no wan know, shey ah go ask...mtchew" I thought to myself... "Though I'm curious but if you wish to keep it a secret...its okay by me" I wish I had hold myself from saying that.. We once heard a rummor that Sandra is into suggar daddies runz but as a loyal crusher, I never believe such words but it seems I'm going to witness it myself tonight... "are you not feeling bored sitting here alone?...or when did you got here??" I asked trying to make a conversation because she seems gonna end the discussion because of the question I asked... "not at all dear...its fun" she answered. <>mtchw. still deh call me dear when you deh wait for a guy...why it no go be fun....I thought<>... as I was about to ask another question someone interrupt by call on me using hand as a sign.... "please just a minute dear..I'll be back" I said to her. "its nothing, you can take your time" she answered back "before nko...if ah no take mah time, shey you go take ahm for me ni......nah your joy e even be as ah deh go...when ah deh take my time..your sugar boy go come...mtchwww" I thought inwardly as I stood up to approach the guy. "ah deh look for Ade nah...where he deh?" I heard the guy asked...judging from what I see...the guy has reach level 17 in weed smoking(thick-dark lips, red eyes and croaky voice)... "me no know jawe...go ask other people" I answered switching to my personal language as I turned to went back to where Sandra is but to my surprise and truth to my thought...she's nowhere to be found... "My Gawd..this moron don fall mah hand jhor...ah no even see my rival weh carry Sandra away...mtchww" I said making my ways to the dance floor... Its show time... TBC...
19 Dec 2015 | 06:03
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Lol....mr loyal crusher
19 Dec 2015 | 07:35
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lolz..following
19 Dec 2015 | 08:04
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following
19 Dec 2015 | 08:27
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Lol...
19 Dec 2015 | 09:09
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dese ones no b three musketers dem b four wit big prob,wel i lyk d way dey roll cos four galz cant live lyk dey do,tinz wuld av gone sour
19 Dec 2015 | 09:21
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lol, humble 'CRUSH' , Ride on jawe,
19 Dec 2015 | 10:17
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Drive dy go abeg, mr loyal crushe
19 Dec 2015 | 10:38
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Where "AST" dey nah. Orr them they hook??. #lol Nex pls.
19 Dec 2015 | 11:04
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Followinq.
19 Dec 2015 | 11:05
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Show time
19 Dec 2015 | 11:37
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it show time let go nd show them
19 Dec 2015 | 12:00
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Lol
19 Dec 2015 | 13:36
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Wetin u dey go dance floor go do wey u no sabi dance
19 Dec 2015 | 14:08
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Continue
19 Dec 2015 | 15:30
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khola paa
19 Dec 2015 | 16:06
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lets qo dia.... Is show time
20 Dec 2015 | 00:40
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Lolx .... *pacard*
20 Dec 2015 | 01:09
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---Episode 10--- . . . The dance floor was rocking with hot beat even seeing a lady without a guy was like searching for a pin inside an ocean...That encourage me to join them even without knowing how to dance like others{but I've start learning from American movies}... As I was busying dancing the little step I knew and searching for any vacant lady to dance with at the same time(I wish to dance with someone to see how good I've become)... I sighted a lady all alone at a corner far from the dancing floor.. "omo, see signal" I said as I approach the unknown-alone-lady. "Hello Angel" I said to her with a smile...don't even think she care to see my smile. "Hi" she answered back with monosylabic word as she looked up and behold its no other person than "Miss Don't Mess With Me", though little afraid but I can't rub-away the mess I had already started messing with her, so I must finish my mess with her... "You are here all alone... aren't you bored... wanna dance??" I asked going straight to the point. "No, thanks" she answered, seems she will be upgrading from mono- to di- to tri- sylabic words but that doesn't discourage me from pushing my luck(dancing all alone is boring likewise sitting all alone)... "oh, maybe you think I'm a stranger thats why you are rejecting dancing with me..don't worry...I mean no harm" I said a little bit nervous "Not atall.. sitting here is fun to me" <>mtchwe, see as she deh form, she no think say nah my time ah manage use to talk to her...nonsense<> I thought to myself "Well, they says judging one part without hearing the other part out was like doing partial..you can try the dance and see which is more fun" I said with determined mind that until she accept, I won't relent. "okay, let's dance" she said giving me victory on our arguement and it makes me smile like a little kid being thrown into the sky and got catched... Watching American movies wasn't in vain...I showcase my just found talent with some dancing steps which make the dance a little bit easy for me......conversing while dancing always make it fun, so to make it fun I started a conversation. "so, may I know your name Angel??" I asked as I grab her hands tightly with mine. She reply with a smile.<>nah name ah ask, nah smile be reply...gobe don happen" I thought to myself. "By chance, are you Smilling or Smiley by name?" I asked with a smile too<>seems we both are having itching cheeks and smiling would cure it<> "No ooo...I'm Rebbecca by name" she answered back without looking at me with a smile... I've once watched a movie which a lady bears Rebbecca was like a devil in human...she realy troubled those who came accross her and since then I always ran from any word "Rebbec".. Though its a movie but I still believe all Rebbecca are dangerous to be with... But this seems different from the Rebbecca I had in mind...Even if it isn't... I still can't run from her when the fun just began... . After like 5mins still dancing, I got to know more about her. she told me where she live which I don't have interest in knowing...its just to make a conversation..... The dance lasted for almost 25mins but to me it look forever because its fun dancing with her...saying the truth, she's a pro...her dancing step was encouraging...it got to a point I wish I could dance more than what I could...we would have named the best couple on the dance floor which would be accepted by me with pleasuer, nothing concern me if she didn't like it since I'm gonna like it...the earth may fall I don't care. BUT that doesn't happen because we aren't the best couple...One guy and a lady was shower with praises and applause as they were named "BEST COUPLE ON THE DANCE FLOOR".. after they were named, we the worst couples had no choice than to depart but those who dance with their spouse don't have reason to split... "Will like seeing you around some other time" I said as I walked away from her which got me a nod as a reply indicating okay. "chaii, she don tire ontop dancing sowtey she deh breathe like a running dog..okay only nah problem to talk" I thought to myself as I kept walking with curiosity of where the parrot and the other two babarians are........like one of my brothers here also does..... Tbc..
20 Dec 2015 | 08:01
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Lolzzzzz,@khola u no wan speak grammar in d presence of sandra,although u re nt dull.Best couple indeed.
20 Dec 2015 | 13:37
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nice 1..following
20 Dec 2015 | 13:52
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@khola46... Mister dont mess with her or else dat devil in human form named rebecca will come visitinq
20 Dec 2015 | 15:27
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---Episode 11--- . . . I walked down to one vacant seat and sat down to relax a bit as a feelings of anger started boiling in me... "Guy, abeg, need a drink" I reminisce how I asked one dude as I walked toward my seat after departing with Rebbecca.. "drinks just got finish but they have gone to got another" the guy answered which causes my present mood... Almost 5mins on seat thinking nothing in particular, I turned my head to see my back and behold its mr parrot with one chick. seems the lady is one of his family in the world of bird because they were both lost in their discussion... Looking keenly just to be sure its him I caught a glimpse of a glass in his hand... <>no be drink be that??...e don blow for this guy weh tell me say drinks don finish<> I thought to myself as I stood up and walked towards where the duo are... "Hi" I said directing my word to the lady as I reach them... "Oh, Hello" the lady said in a way to tell me to leave them alone she's enjoying Shola's company. <>mtchw...who go even disturb you...nah drink me wan snatch from your partner<> I thought to myself... "wetin deh inside this tumbler" I asked Shola a rhetorical question without even minding a lady is there with us... Since I'm not crushing on her...why would I mind... "its a drink..why did you ask??" Shola answered back with no pidgin. <>hahahaha, wehrey(madman) sef fit speak English infront of a lady...abi nah him crush...nah him sabi jhor<> I thought to myself. "make I see" I said as he gave me the glass, without being told, I found my ways leaving the duo, I know quite well he won't make an attempt to stop me infront of his crush(its a great chance)... "you go cure my thirst...dancing no easy...let's find a place to siddon first" I said to the glass like its a being.. After devouring the drink on a seat near one corner. I found myself feeling sleepy immediately, all I could remember is that my eyes got closed and everything went blackout... . . Opening my eyes little by little with a heavy head... I could see a ray(sun ray) which shows its morning or probably noon.. "how this herbivous go leave me sleep till now without waking me up" I said to myself inwardly as I tried to stand up but couldn't cause I was so weak. From what I felt, seems I slept on the floor throughout the night "aha. wetin ah deh do for ground...no be on chair I sit?" I asked myself inwardly as it baffle me how I could have fell from the chair... "but people suppose wake me up". I couldn't help but got confused. I looked around to survey my sorrounding and found out I'm in a room with so many people sleeping not on bed but on the floor. "this no be my room nah..where I sleep yesternight. sleep no go die peacefuly oo" I said as I suddenly develop energy to stood up...I could term where I am as a cage.. "please help me ooo" I couldn't help but shout to no one in particular as the fear of where I am continue growing in me... "hey, guy wetin do you nah...relax no be only deh here, why you go deh shout?" I heard a voice which sound like the voice of the guy that call on me and Shola at the party. "ah..which kin nightmare be this...nah bad omen" I thought to myself as I rub my palm with my face but still the nightmare still exist.. "who put me here ooo" I cried out again. "wetin do you nah...no shout again orelse ah go blow your head for there" I heard the voice again but this time with threat... Searching for where the voice came from to see the owner and as I thought its the same Devil at the party but he is on ordinary singlet and boxer... "I'm doomed" I sang out like a song of praise... Tbc...
21 Dec 2015 | 06:52
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Haaah wah happened next???.
21 Dec 2015 | 07:29
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Lol..funny episode
21 Dec 2015 | 09:09
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Hahaha ... *pacard*
21 Dec 2015 | 11:06
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uh..where ur friends na
21 Dec 2015 | 11:30
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sorry o bhu instead of dat start real prayer
21 Dec 2015 | 11:31
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Lolz nawa u oo, dm put igbo {weed} 4 d drink ni
21 Dec 2015 | 12:04
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hmmm.... Beta shut up and find ur way out 4 dat caqe... Or u qo wit disfiqure face
21 Dec 2015 | 13:18
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yea u got it u are DOOM
21 Dec 2015 | 13:33
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lol nice job keep up d good work
21 Dec 2015 | 17:42
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lol , in police cell?
21 Dec 2015 | 19:29
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Following.... @khola46 ride on but wait o khola hw many khola una get for house det will make u no 46 no tell me say una reach 50 o
22 Dec 2015 | 04:52
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Lol. @Frankkay Nah so oo...we plenty sowtey nah insect you go think Khola be for our house...nah number 46 ah be...
22 Dec 2015 | 05:22
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---Episode 12--- . . . Seeing that the nightmare won't finished as fast as I though, I had no option than to ask the only boss I have inside the cage we are questions I don't know... "bro, abeg, where this be nah?" I asked him gently not to get to his nerve. "nah PS you deh oo..make you just relex" he answered back but got me confuse how we would be inside play station and him wearing what he wears... "you mean say we deh play station??" I asked with innocent mind "no, nah fight station...mumu.. ah deh talk police station, you deh talk play station...ps2 nko?" he said and asked as he answered me. "haaah, how ah take get here?" I asked myself but aloud. "Sergeant, the pig among human don wake up oo" I heard a voice and I looked up to see one black man with black cloth..."oh, you don wake up?" another man in black cloth asked as he pointed his "f.uck you" finger at me. I wonder why people always asked questions that need no answer...He found me not sleeping yet he still asked me question.. "Your own don finish for the problem weh you caused us yesterday, people no go know say as you be like broom you weight pass Obasanjo pigs, even you snore like pigs, you no allow me sleep ontop say you deh snore...you go suffer for my hand" the man added to his jamb question which made me dump as I kept looking at his lips. The fear of where I am got increase as Mr Coal finish his ranting... "bro, shey ah snore like them talk?" I asked my boss at a corner but he ignored me... "mtchwe, wetin deh even do him...ah go still teach you lesson" I thought to myself... Some hours after I detect where I am(all those who sleep has woke up and went through what I pass through), Mr Coal(the black man in black cloth) brought something in a nylon calling it breakfast which I don't even care to see or taste. "eat ahm make you no die, nah your life go bring money come for us...make your family sha come fast to bail you all" the man said as he went back to his duty... Even my glutton demon can't preach for me to eat in the condition I am...I just kept watching those whose their gluttonity demon is powerful than mine as they were busy fighting each other because of the content in the nylon... "this people no get future" I thought to myself... . When I thought things has got worse for me, another worst thing worser than worse occur like a dream when Mr Coal came to call all those people inside the cell out except me.. "Segun Vincent" I heard the man called and the only boss I had inside the cell stood up to join the guys whom are on their feet beside Mr Coal. "wow, see nice name...him name no fit him atall" I thought to myself. "a man came here and d.p.o don grant your bail" Mr Coal said while turning to leave. "abeg, you forget my name nah" I ranged out to him. "who you be?, better die in there" the man advice with him black heart as he left with the people he called leaving only me inside the cage... "aahh. mogbe(I'm doomed" I said and instantly I started remembering my past life.. I remeber how papa usualy sing it to my ears never to join bad gangs, I remember mama's sweetest soup and wonder if I would be able to eat that soup ever again in my life, I remember my long lost gf in our town, my ex-girlfriend, I remember my friends and wonder if those morons will miss me when I'm gone... I kept remembering all the sins I've commited as tears continue dropping from my two eyes. "God, I'm a sinner... please forgive me all my sins and guide me into paradise..please be with my parent and siblings, be with my friends...please be with my soul" I prayed with tears but re-thought at once and change my prayer direction. "God, ah no wish to die young, if you remove me comot from here...I will be loyal servant...ah no go go party again...please save me God" I kept praying as I remeber how sweet life is.....Life is not easy but no one wish to leave it... TBC.
22 Dec 2015 | 05:25
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Hmmmm
22 Dec 2015 | 07:26
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@khola46 dat mean say na wit drum una de take cook.... Followin dis bumper to bumper no dulling bro ride on
22 Dec 2015 | 08:38
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hmmm...following
22 Dec 2015 | 08:47
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Dis isnt funny bt i dnt knw y am shinning teeth
22 Dec 2015 | 11:35
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Where ur frnds they na
22 Dec 2015 | 11:43
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were are your frds
22 Dec 2015 | 11:43
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Hahaha cos u dey wahala, You don remember baba God. If na me be him, the kind slap ah 4 qive ehn; ya crocodile tears 4 disappear. Nex pls.
22 Dec 2015 | 12:32
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U're right oooooo
22 Dec 2015 | 14:20
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So funny...
22 Dec 2015 | 14:34
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hmmm continue to hope
22 Dec 2015 | 16:07
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Humanbeans only remember God wen dey r in torobu......so yu sin diz lot?
23 Dec 2015 | 03:22
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Na for fiqht station u remember say God dey......
23 Dec 2015 | 04:26
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hahaha , instead of u to dey pity ursef , u dey here dey remember ur mama 'pot soup and ur village girlfriend ? KHOLA ur case no b here oh,
23 Dec 2015 | 05:39
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---Episode 13--- . . . Through out that day I never stop nailing on my prayer point with sudden fast I put myself into, because I never wish to eat anything even if I wish to...the black men won't grant my wish... The next day was uneventful except that I had to cry for food when worms started having fun with my intestine... Three days after changing enviroment into police custody which I've even accepted my own fate... "hey pig" I heard the same voice I first heard when I change resident.. "wetin do this charcoal again" I thought to myself. "better deh thank your star, them d.p.o don talk say make ah release you.. you just deh chop our food since, bad market..come out jhor" the man said again which made me rise to my feet with full force... "mtchw, no be your fault, nah me weh go party get fault...ah don cut party from my life, never will I go party again" I thought to myself as I exit the cage-like room... For the first time in three day... I felt a fresh air blew on me and its then my brain got back to normal. I've lost my mentality inside that dark home only God saved me... I helded home with my cloth on but with one nonsense slippers I couldn't even give out to beggers... "we no find shoe for your leg when we carry you and even no phone/money for your pocket" the black man said as I went to retrieve my things. I knew quite well that my shoes and phone has being place on market by them, but for the money...Even the gods can't search that trouser and find a penny...I don't always take my wallet to party no matter what... I drop my thought and helded home with me looking like a terrorist... "who be that?" I heard a faintly voice as I knock on the door of our apartment. "your papa for village" I answered without caring to know who ask the jamb question.. "yeeeeeh.. heeellllp, his ghost don show oo" Shola said as he berged the door after opening it and saw the century terrorist... "wetin do this guy??...nah your brother go be ghost" I said as I walked in and behold I saw the two babarians with black cloth even more darker than those policemen's cloth and their face swelling like they have cried for days...... "wetin happen here nah??" I asked as the two babarians is trying to run from me... "Please, for the sake of God, don't hurt me, I tried my best to look for you but these people never allow me" Ade said as he pointed to Tolu but dropped his hand when he couldn't find Shola anywhere around... "nah lie oo, we look for you oo" Shola said out of nowhere as he came out from the kitchen with speed kneeling far from where I am... "we look everywhere for you but as we deh search, nah one guy tell us say them police shoot you as you deh run say them don carry your corpse away" he added to his word... "You mad ni?? You con believe the guy??" I said with a loud tone which frightening them more. "pleease oo...we go give you a memorable burial ceremony...please don't hurt me oo" Tolu said for the first time since I entered the room. "nah your grandpa burial you go do for your village...not mine... ah no be ghost" I said using that chance to remind Tolu where he came from...I knew he is helpless so he couldn't form any anger... "but ah vex oo...you just make them carry me go dark home and you no follow me" I said trying to calm them down a bit.. "it isn't like that" Ade said. "its like what then?" I fired back at him. "please just don't hurt us" Ade said avoiding the question.. "ah talk say ah no be ghost, you see ghost with beard before??" I said with anger as they still don't believe me... "eh, nah so ooo, ghost no fit look like bokoharam oo" Shola said with joy. "but wetin happen weh you all wear black?" I asked "nah your death we deh cry on oo...neighbours don greet us plenty" Tolu said as he rise to his feet... "abeg, make ah just first go shower, eat and sleep...you go gist me in the evening" I said with joyous mind as I left them laughing at my appearance.... I've got my freedom back... Tbc.
23 Dec 2015 | 08:25
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Na wen ple dy inside problem we dy remember God.
23 Dec 2015 | 08:32
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I don laugh tire
23 Dec 2015 | 08:38
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[b]Them no even wait 4 days dem don start 2 dey get visitors[/b]
23 Dec 2015 | 11:38
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Wow ... Dix episode gat me laughing out ma lungs
23 Dec 2015 | 12:38
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Lol mr khola u don turn to ghost o...lol
23 Dec 2015 | 13:21
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Lmbo
23 Dec 2015 | 16:15
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Lwkmd oooo
23 Dec 2015 | 16:51
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Hmmm
23 Dec 2015 | 17:02
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lolz...ur frnds funny ooo
23 Dec 2015 | 17:44
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lolzed, khola abeg i neva wan die wid laughter o,
23 Dec 2015 | 18:33
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Lollzzzz
23 Dec 2015 | 19:04
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lol so funny
23 Dec 2015 | 19:46
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lolz...... Ur friendz don qv u death sentence.... Na send news qo villa remain... But thank God sha
24 Dec 2015 | 02:19
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---Episode 14--- . . . In the evening when I've done what an independent man could do after gaining freedom(shaving my beard, bathing, eating and sleeping like a pig those blackmen called me), we all are in the room gisting.. "how the police thing take happen sef ah wan know" I asked no one in particular. "see, nah infront of that lady ah deh...you remember the lady weh you see with me when you come snatch that drink from me...nah suddenly ah see people running helter skelter from something, me even wan wait to see wetin happen,but as ah hear gunshot, nah cultist ah think them be... nah toilet window me take escape oo" Shola narrate his own story. "I was with the dj when someone ran up to us and announce that the police had arrive, I wasn't myself anymore immediately I heard that and had no option than to begged the dj for my escape...we both hide ourself inside the unuse speaker as the dj called it" Ade said giving me concern how they could.. "how nah?" I asked him with a confuse look. "Only God knows why that guy(dj) brought a box that look like a speaker to that party oo..but heat almost killed me" he said as we all laugh to his word. "how una own" I asked Tolu. "ah swear them for carry me among oo, I deh look for chick to hook up..suddenly ah found mahself on the ground as people deh run for them life, my instint tell me say nah lady it go be..as ah hear gunshot nah ihn ah crawl from one table to another until ah reach a hidden place weh them no fit see me" Tolu said but I still need more answers, so I asked. "how me con sleep till them carry me".. "hahahahahahah" Shola laughed and added "no be your glutton kill you?". "wetin you mean?" I threw at him again but Tolu answered. "the drink weh those bastard bring last...ehn, no be inside bottle ones, nah inside one drum them bring ahm come". "wetin now concern ahm with my sleep?" I asked. "Shioo...them put sleeping pills join the drink..only God know why them stupid do ahm...nah that drink you snatch from me" Shola said and I almost cried out for drinking such drink. "so, Khola took your place in police custody" Ade added with laugh... "tell us your story nah" Tolu asked directing the question to me... "guys, ah suffer ooo..chaii, e no easy.. but ah no go tell you since the blessing go circulate among us all...you all go also see how that place is" I said which got them throwing curses at me like "nah you go still go" "you inlaw go see ahm" "you'll still visit them there as you wish for me" and so on... "it don do jhor.. since when you con wear black" I asked changing the topic. "nah because someone tell us say make we remove wetin we put for our door, you for see ahm when you come" Tolu said still with not the answer I want. "wetin be that" I asked. "we don put obituary and wanted picture of you there, obituary for left and wanted for right, and people don deh come greet us...thats why we wear black cloth oo" Shola answered. "ah swear, you all don craze, me no go die, nah old papa you go post them obituary and wanted pictures everywhere cause you no go see them dead body... you decent madmen" I said with anger boiling in me which they all reject with "back to sender sign"...that night I sleep and dream about me marrying a beautiful princess I knew not but I wake up the moment I'm about to kiss the bride... . The next day was uneventful because we all stay indoor without anyone having nowhere to go...we all cooked together which makes it all fun and got me thanking God for giving me another chance and reasons to laugh......friendship is the most worthy gift to die for... TBC.
24 Dec 2015 | 07:30
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[b]Seriously una friendship dey funny[/b]
24 Dec 2015 | 11:26
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Lol...u 4 do thankgiving 4 church o
24 Dec 2015 | 13:22
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dz ur friendz enh
24 Dec 2015 | 13:33
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frndship in deed
24 Dec 2015 | 13:39
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Lolx una 4 cool die
24 Dec 2015 | 13:41
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Cnt stop laughing
24 Dec 2015 | 15:28
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so funny
24 Dec 2015 | 15:35
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Can't stop laughing
24 Dec 2015 | 15:57
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Friendship indeed
24 Dec 2015 | 17:22
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can't stop laughing o,
24 Dec 2015 | 18:48
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seriously dis story is so funny
24 Dec 2015 | 18:51
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Welcome back home @khola
25 Dec 2015 | 01:21
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---Episode 15--- . . . -Three Month Later- "where were you two posted?" Ade asked as we all laid on bed in our room except for Shola who hasn't return from where he went to recieve his call up letter. "nah Enugu them madt post me jawe" Tolu answered. "nah P.H them throw me go nah" I answered as Tolu said his... "I'm going to miss you guys" Ade said with weak voice. "mah tell you, me go miss you all sowtey" Tolu also said while I kept mute as I remembered how we all met... FLASH BACK. "Good day here" I heard a voice inside our compound calling for somebody's attention as I was washing clothes at the backyard. I went on tracing the voice and sighted our landlord banging our door like his life depends on it. The the man is a lovely man, he even wishes Tolu & I to be his sin(impossical) cause the love is too much(yeah,its Tolu & I in the beginning, we met when I came for my registration as a fresher in EKSU{Ekiti State University},we were both freshers but he had complete his registration, seeing how stressful I am, he offer a hand to help. which I accept with smile...since then we've been friends and roommate).... "Hello here" I heard him says again. "Good afternoon baba" I said loudly for him to hear me to avoid getting the door broken... "My son, how are you and your friend? the man asked. "we are fine sir" I answered and added. " Baba, what brings you here in this sunny afternoon?, you should have sent for me". "I don't want to bother you my son, thats why I came here myself..its a news I'm even sad to give you" the man answered. "What is the news baba?" I asked with fear. "My daughter is coming back home from oversea and I don't want her to logded in an hotel, I had no option than this place, so you will need to pack out in the next 7days" the man said with sobber face. "WHAT!" I exclaimed. The man just kept mute within 5mins. "I'm going now my son" the man said. "mtchw,you still deh call me son??...go find your son elsewhere...mtchw as you deh go just make sure say nah heaven you deh go straight" I thought inwardly as I was still in the shock of the man explosive bomb. ..In the evening when Tolu arrived from campus...(we are in 300lv then with me & him studying Elect-Elect & Micro-biology respectively)... "Guy, the landlord has came to give us sacked letter o" I joked with him. "Lol. as per say him own a company che" he answered back. "Bro, seriously the man has came to give us quick notice o" I said with seriousness. "nah joke? wetin he talk say we do ahm?" he answered with questions as he grab my word. "he just talk say him daughter deh come for abroad say she go deh use here make we pack out" I answered his question. "Nah lie jhor, person weh deh come from that place go come stay here??...ah no believe that man, he no even get daughter for abroad, who go buy ahm visa...mtchw" he said with anger. "me deh think say make we go see that brother weh be our tutorial master when we be freshers" I said to him. "Nah true oo, since he don pass comot school" he said. "Yes oo, even ah don visit him for him house before, mheen, nah two room apartment only him deh ooo, he fit accommodate us since he like us nah" I said to him with smile. "okay nah, make me go there tommorow... but this landlord fall my hand o, and he go deh call person him son, shey he fit throw him son out of his house at a time like this" he said still with his angry face... "no mind him, he also no go wish to throw us out, maybe nah condition warrant him" I said trying to cover for the man "even he talk ahm with sadness in him" I added... "abeg no preach for me ontop him matter jhor" he said. "shebi you go go him house go fight him, no deh form useless anger here ooo" I said which kept him mute... Tbc...
25 Dec 2015 | 05:07
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yes o pack ur load nd go d landlord daughter will soon arrive
25 Dec 2015 | 10:12
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@khola46 ... I am disappionted in u ... Hw could u????? Why dint u tel me so i'll handle dat fake fada ...#frowns
25 Dec 2015 | 10:28
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Nice story.
25 Dec 2015 | 14:37
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Hmmmmm,maybe d landlord dey fear u o,bc if u dey 4 his house and when her daughter arive u go fit go scope his daughter @khola
25 Dec 2015 | 15:30
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Following...
25 Dec 2015 | 15:34
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nice work mahn,
25 Dec 2015 | 16:58
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Getting more interesting
25 Dec 2015 | 18:36
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Oya
25 Dec 2015 | 19:37
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lolz, nice story @khola46
25 Dec 2015 | 23:09
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No be him fault...
26 Dec 2015 | 01:29
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7days Quite notice nawaooooooooooo
26 Dec 2015 | 01:46
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---Episode 16--- . . . The next day came so fast as I expected and we have conclude on going to see the brother that would help us out with the problem we found ourself in the evening when he would have return from work... In the evening.. "Guy, how much deh una hand?" Tolu asked as we are getting dressed for our agent mission. "nah just 50naira weh ah collect as change when we deh buy maize nah" I said trying to remind him. "make we use ahm take bike?" he asked. "satan himself no fit get ahm from me, not to talk of his handtool" I answered him. "who now be satan tool" he asked as his phone beep indicating a sign of message from any social network he might have logged into and he smile. "nah `I do' alert be that?" I asked ignoring his question. "no, nah I die" he answered. "Sha let us carry our leg deh go" he added.. "Good evening" I said as I knock on a well painted with blue color door. "Yes, who is that?, I'm coming please" I heard a voice coming from inside. The door was open and I could see a disappointment in the look of someone we came to meet... "Oh, Khola & Tolu right" he said and added "come in"... "yeah bro... thanks" we both answered him in unison as we went inside... "my Gawd, see house??...devil don suffer for this brother hand...ehn... this no be ordinary fine oo" I kept thinking inwardly... "have your seat" he said pointing at a chair. "its been a long time...how have you been?..oh pardon me...what can I offer you" he added. "Nothing Brother Ade, what brought us here won't allow us to swallow anything be it liquid or solid" I said which gain me a stare from Tolu.. "whats that?? any problem with the school??" he asked with care in his voice. "nothing like that, we were just sent parking suddenly where we are staying??" I answered giving Tolu no chance to speak. "why?" he asked again but Tolu doesn't wait a sec. before saying "its just a stupid excuse which I couldn't see meaning to it". "We just came to asked for help from you because the man only gave us grace of a week to park out and we have nobody to turn to than you...please bro, can you accomodate us for the time been?" I added to Tolu's word going straight to the point... "How could a man be so wicked like that?" Bro Ade said asking us a question google can't find answers to... "well, you are free to come here anytime starting from now on even if you decide to parked over here tommorow, its okay by me" he answered which got me & the moron with me smile like we won a big jackpot. "bro, I fit get any drink weh don cold pass freezer itself??" Tolu asked all of a sudden. "you too deh fumble, me sef weh like food no open mouth ask drink, nah drink you come here drink" I answered him. "wetin be your own problem, shey make ah no celebrate say God don help us ni?" he fired at me. "nonsense, nah drinks be your thanksgiving to God?" I said which got our spectator laughing. "its alright guys, let me get you a drink" Bro Ade said as he stood up to get a drink. "abeg bro, take mine join jawe" I said to him. "never, since drinking no be thanksgiving, no drink anything here atall" Tolu voice out. "nah your problem be that, if no be say ah deh thirsty, me no go drink nah" I answered him. "so, shey nah forthy deh do me ehn?" he asked back. "mumu, nah thirsty ah talk, no be thirty" I answered him. "nah same thing, if no be the `s' weh deh there" he said as Bro Ade brought the drink. "here are the drinks" he said as he dropped two bottles of Fanta on the table infront of us... We drink and chatted till we left for our home...We parked parked out of our apartment to live with Bro Ade... Thats how "KAT" met coincidentaly... TBC...
26 Dec 2015 | 05:15
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That page 18 episode 13 got me laughing out mah intestine. Just too funny! Next pls.
26 Dec 2015 | 10:49
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next.... To know hw una take meet shola the talkative
26 Dec 2015 | 20:31
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---Episode 17--- ---FINAL EPISODE--- . . Three weeks after Ade welcome us into his house, he came home with a guy saying he had the same problem as ours but with different story. "he had a misunderstanding with his brother and he sent him out because its his house, so he came to ask for my help and I can't say yes at instant without bringing him home to ask of your own view" Ade said which make me smile with a thought that he is somehow abnormal. "bro, why won't we support you in anything you do...anything you did is done" Tolu said and I support him "nah true, we go like make we be one family...let him come join us".. "his name is Shola, a student of the same school of yours studying Business Administration" Ade said and we greeted him...thats how the four strangers started living as a family...One evening Ade called us all down for discusion. "Guys, there is something I wish to let you know...you always did it to me and it always make me frustrated" he said while we all asked in a confusion. "whats is that bro??". "Calling me brother makes me feel somehow, let us all be formal with each other, see me as a friend and call me one, that will make us free to each other...please do me the favor by making me your friend not brother" he said sounding like asking for favor. "but bro, I mean..." Tolu was saying as he was cut short by Ade. "please...do me the favor". "okay bro" we all said to him...though it takes us time to blend with his wishes but we got used to it and we live friends since then... [Back to Present]. I snapped out of my thought when a hard slap landed on my hand. "wetin you deh think?, we don deh call you since nah?" Tolu said as Shola berge in with a nylon in his hand.. "no mind me jawe" I answered with faint voice. "Whats inside that nylon??" you brought something for us along?" Ade asked as Shola came toward us. "nah my call up letter oo" he answered. "where them post you?" I answered with hope he was posted the same state as I. "them mad ah swear, nah Taraba State oo" he answered back. "what side is that state located in Nigeria?" Tolu asked as a village boy he was. "nah south-west nah" I answered him. "how could you says Taraba is located in south-west?" Ade said amidst of laugh. "no mind the mumu, make him deh ask jamb question" I said like a guy that was been dump by his lover... "Let me see the content in that nylon" Ade asked and Shola gave it to him. "Oh My God!" Ade exclaimed. "wetin happen" I asked with curiosity. "The letter has been soaked with water" he said as I snatch it from his hand. "hahahahah. the letter don bath tire" I said as I checked it. "why you go put pure water weh don turn block into where your letter deh? and you no come from village ah for talk" I said amidst of my laugh but the moron just kept looking like the moron he is.. "make him go return ahm say him no want again nah" Tolu said and we all laugh to it... We chatted till night when we all went to sleep... That night wasn't a good one atall because I had bad omen throught as I continue changing how I slept...... I'm gonna miss the friends and brother like a family... I've pass through the hell and paradise on earth with them and its a memories to remember... Three weeks after we recieved the call up letter, we departed and leave Ade with us shelding tears like a babies.. "I'll miss you" we all said to each other as we continue hugging ourself for the uptenth time... That moment I knew quite well I've lost something preciou. I started feeling something is gone from my life as I enter a cab to take my leave to P.H... Bye-Bye to Ekiti State. Bye-Bye to the collection of KAST. If God wishes... we will surly meet again. . The End... . . . Thanks so much to all those that encourage me with comments all through the journey I've put them into...You are all wonderful..... GOD BLESS... KAMSAHAMNIDA. . Don't Forget... I need your vote in the ongoing contest...Your Vote For @KHOLA46... Gomawo...
27 Dec 2015 | 05:53
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Wow what a funny story
27 Dec 2015 | 08:10
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Woaw..what a nice and funny story...weldone bro..four fingers up.
27 Dec 2015 | 08:52
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Nice One Bro @Khola46. Dat was Fun! Fun!! Fun!!!. Gomawo Too. :-)
27 Dec 2015 | 09:25
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A very interestin nd funny story kudos to u bro
27 Dec 2015 | 09:37
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Wow .... Twas nice ... @khola46 wen we meet d name will change to KASTE AMEN
27 Dec 2015 | 10:07
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Gud one.. THUMBS UP...
27 Dec 2015 | 10:12
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Friend lyk family.......wat a story
27 Dec 2015 | 10:27
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Nice ending. What an interesting and funny story
27 Dec 2015 | 10:28
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wow , just amazing , OBRIGADO my guy,
27 Dec 2015 | 11:28
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Weldon o' funny story n a 9ic ending, dat is wat we cal family friends. @khola46 gud luck in thy vote oo
27 Dec 2015 | 11:42
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[b]I enjoyed the ride... Funny and interestinq story..... @khola46 u do well....[/b]
27 Dec 2015 | 12:57
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smilimg..love it till d end..well done @khola46
27 Dec 2015 | 13:10
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Wonderful,really enjoy d story..welldone @Khola..
27 Dec 2015 | 14:39
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Wow! Love ds story plenty
27 Dec 2015 | 17:20
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Nice one...
28 Dec 2015 | 01:31
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Finally finally, o ga o! What a funny story!
28 Dec 2015 | 02:36
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nice one
28 Dec 2015 | 09:55
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I really enjyed dis story, i will miss u guyz, hw i wish it will hav season 2
17 Jan 2016 | 11:55
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Good one dear
28 Feb 2016 | 13:27
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ride on
17 Apr 2016 | 17:29
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Nice story
15 Jul 2016 | 17:43
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Funny
19 Jul 2016 | 06:34
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Nice work
19 Jul 2016 | 06:34
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Nice story
19 Jul 2016 | 11:29
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Loi
19 Jul 2016 | 13:21
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Nice story
20 Jul 2016 | 12:24
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Quite Funny And Interesting
29 Jan 2017 | 12:41
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